No Parking On The Battleground
by Mind of the Childishly Naive
Summary: The good, the bad, and the - well, I don't want to say ugly, but... yeah, the ugly. / Strawhat things
1. hands and scars

-x-

No Parking On The Battleground  
_hands and scars_

-x-

All of the Strawhats have scars on their hands.

They're small, mostly-insignificant white spots and lines that you have to really look to see, but Chopper notices them immediately. He has seen a lot of hands and scars while working with Doctorine - he's stitched together any number of wounds and thawed or cut off as many frost-bitten fingers, and he knows that each one has a story behind it. These are all different, though. These aren't the hands and scars and stories of strangers, these are the hands and scars and stories of his friends.

(His friends...)

Luffy is making faces at him when he notices, crossing his eyes and saying something stupid, waving his hands in front of his face. The mid-day sun hits them just right, and Chopper sees them: the tiny discolored stripes, some thin and some broad and all of them deep, across the top of each of the captain's fingers. Chopper bandaged those fingers himself, not even a week ago, so he knows that story well. It's one of the things about Luffy that baffles and fascinates him the most.

The scars on Usopp's hands are pretty self-explanatory. Chopper only has to watch him repair one wall or another once to know that he is a builder by hobby and necessity and not by profession, and he has hammered or nailed or sawed his hands on a regular basis.

Sanji's hands surprise him, because it's hard to imagine the chef's hand slipping, though Chopper has only seen him prepare a few dozen meals. Still, when he looks hard enough, there are three of them that stand out - one on the outside of his right hand and two on his left, below his thumb and across his knuckles. When Chopper pipes up the nerve to ask what they're from, Sanji turns his hands over to look for them, as if he'd forgotten they existed, and then he laughs, pointing to each of them, and says, "Zippo lighter. Potato peeler. Pantry door."

He actually asks to see Zoro's hands, and the swordsman sets down his weights and holds his clenched fists out to be examined, silently, but obligingly, perplexed. Chopper shakes his hands open and turns them over. At first he only sees calloused fingers and heavy knuckles, but then he notices the scrapes on the sides of Zoro's hands, just behind his thumb and forefinger - where the guard has either broken or smashed against his hand.

Nami's is a line across the back of her left hand, somewhat wide in the middle and tapering out at the ends, like a knife. It almost looks deliberate, but Chopper doesn't ask because she has lots of other small and subtle scars on her hands and fingers to accompany it. Hers are the worst of them all (still smooth and soft with neat, trimmed nails, but still unmistakably the worst) and that really surprises him because girls are supposed to be more attentive than guys and Nami doesn't strike him as the type to be careless or clumsy.

There are even fine, off-white lines on the backs and sides of Vivi's hands; long stripes that all flow in the same direction. She claims responsibility for those, herself, when he points them out - learning to swing those peacock blades took months and months of practice, she says, and in the beginning she wrapped them around her arms far more often than she hit her target.

His hands are different...

All the scars he has are hidden under the fur, even in his human form, and they are all reminders of that Amiudake mushroom. He remembers the deep gouges left in his hoofs, light gray against black, though the keratin has long-since grown them out and left no trace of them. His scars aren't so easy to see...

But he's sure his friends have plenty of other scars that he can't see, as well.

-x-

(A/n) Word-a-day prompt was SCARS. P: I figured I might as well expand to the rest of the crew and ship and deep nakama-ship instead of just the captain and the navigator~ None of these will mention anything past the DavyBack Fight, because I stopped reading ages ago, part-way through Water7, and I haven't yet managed to gather up the rest of the manga to read (to my complete and unmitigated despair).

I think it's funny that both sets start off near DrumIsland.

-Motcn


	2. the parchment curls up in places

-x-

No Parking On The Battleground  
_the parchment curls up in places_

-x-

Nami remembers every chart she's ever drawn.

She has made hundreds and hundreds - thousands and thousands - of land-and-sea charts over the past eight years, and she salvaged nothing from Arlong Park. There was nothing there worth salvaging and she wouldn't have, even if there had been. Those charts hadn't been hers. She put her blood and ink and life into them, but they weren't her charts. The way she sees it, she has eight years worth of lost time to make up for, and she delights in drawing out each crisp line again, because this time she _wants to._

She smiles while she works, now - honestly smiles - because she isn't locked in a room by herself, and not allowed to leave _for anything_ until she finishes what she's been put in there to do. She doesn't go without food or drink, or sleep, or bathroom breaks. She doesn't draw until her fingers bleed, and she doesn't get beat for making mistakes because she doesn't _make_ mistakes and if she does, she takes a new sheet of parchment out of the stack and begins again.

These charts are _perfect._

_Her charts are perfect._

They aren't stained with blood and the tears she swore she'd never let fall again, but couldn't hold back. They're smudged by her wrists while she works, and by Luffy's arm if he leans across the table to talk to her, or Usopp's thumbs if he picks it up to see what she's doing. They're creased from Zoro's rough fingers when he silently passes them back to her. And if she's working in the galley while Sanji's cooking on an exceptionally hot day, the parchment curls up in places against the heat and humidity.

They're folded and creased and wrinkled and some of the edges are torn. The stains are from sweat, not always hers; they're from orange juice; and tea; mustard and other condiments; she knows there are a handful of grease stains on a handful of charts from Luffy's inconsiderate, grubby fingers; there are water marks; and ink blots when her pen has disagreed with her; and dozens or hundreds of other things because asking for peace and stillness on this ship is like asking for rain in the desert and accidents happen.

And still, her charts are perfect.

-x-

(A/n) Word-a-day prompt was CARTOGRAPHY, which was right up my alley, Ched. P:

-Motcn


	3. rising long into the night

-x-

No Parking On The Battleground  
_rising long into the night_

-x-

Robin doesn't distance herself from them intentionally.

She prefers being within earshot of the commotion, close enough to hear the jokes and jibes, the clinking of utensils and glasses, the banging of fists and feet against the table, and the loud, relentless laughter rising long into the night - but far enough away to politely get out of participating. Her fun is in watching and listening to them, and in occasionally poking and pulling at them. The captain, the doctor, and long nose get her attention the most, because their reactions are always exaggeratedly the best. Most of the time when a book is resting in her lap, while she sits in her quiet corner, her eyes aren't even drawn to it.

She's watching the cook and long nose dancing and singing, with the tiny doctor in between them.

The captain as he tackles his first mate over a dispute concerning whose steak the captain has eaten.

(He has eaten a portion of everyone's steak.)

The navigator as she withdraws from the table before the two can extend their wrestling to unceremoniously include her.

She comes to sit beside Robin on the stairs, and Robin pretends to look up from her book and notice her, her eyebrows raised in silent inquiry. Miss Navigator wordlessly sinks down onto the steps, a few below her, and leans back on her elbows, crossing one long leg over the other. She sighs heavily, as if she's exhausted, and Robin rests her chin in the palm of her hand, smiling warmly as she waits for the complaint she knows will come.

"Jeez, they're so _obnoxious_," the navigator says, but Robin sees the amusement on her face and hears the affection in her tone.

She chuckles softly.

Neither of them would want these men any other way.

-x-

(A/n) Word-a-day prompt was DISTANCE. I was going to write something completely different, and then this happened. P: Forgive this one a little, maybe, it's been a while and I don't entirely remember a lot of Robin.

-Motcn


	4. multicolored bruises

-x-

No Parking On The Battleground  
_multicolored bruises_

-x-

After every fight, the men compare bruises.

Zoro has more cuts as souvenirs than anything else, but he shows a few bruised knuckles, a large purple mark on his left shoulder, and then he pulls off his boot. He knows this one is what's going to win him this grisly contest and he props his heel up on the barrel, grinning triumphantly at the others. Three of his smaller toes and the top of his foot are smashed, obviously (though only slightly) flatter than normal. They're an ugly blue and yellow color, and the nails are cracked and bloody.

He's overly pleased to see the cook's look of dismay as he bites down on his cigarette.

"Shit, marimo, what the hell did you _do?"_

Usopp curls his fingers and toes, grimacing as he stares.

Luffy laughs, "Man, you're foot looks _bad!"_

The swordsman grins.

"Yup. It does."

Usopp's bruise is by far the biggest, though he wears it like a badge of honour. It's dark purple against his skin, stretching across his back, from his hip to his ribs, and around his left side. Luffy, of course, marvels at the size of it and the varied, bloodied tones of color, and pulls the strap of Usopp's overalls down off his shoulder to see it better.

He grins and chuckles, "Wow, that's cool~ It must've hurt!"

Usopp plants his hands on his hips, looking proud and nonchalant as he shrugs his shoulders, "Yeah, I guess. A brave warrior like myself doesn't feel pain, of course. I would have never even noticed it if it weren't so huge!"

"Funny," Sanji says, grinning, as well, "I felt every one of mine."

He pulls up the legs of his black slacks, presenting an array of multicolored bruises that cover both legs, from his ankles to his knees, laying on top of one another in heavy welts signifying each time he blocked or delivered a blow. Luffy is as impressed as ever.

"You've got tons of 'em!"

"It happens," Sanji says, his hands in his pockets. He raises a curly eyebrow at Luffy. "So, are you bringing anything to the table, Captain?"

Luffy thinks for a moment, slowly developing a frown as he looks down at his arms and legs.

There's not a bruise in sight.

Usopp chuckles, "You're made of rubber, remember? I don't think you bruise too easily."

Zoro looks curiously from Sanji's freckled legs, to Usopp's darkened side, and finally down at his own mangled foot.

It's hard to say who should win; the most, the biggest, or the worst. Naturally, he thinks _he_ should win - just look at his toes! They're not even the right size anymore. He can still walk, though, so that doesn't really matter. It doesn't hinder his form at all, he can still put all his weight on it, and they'll no doubt even out again eventually if he walks on it enough. The captain, of course, has the deciding vote, so Zoro looks at him and waits.

Suddenly, Luffy laughs.

"Hey, wait, I've got one," he says, fumbling with his belt buckle, "I've got one! I forgot!"

The other three watch with growing apprehension and skepticism, arching eyebrows and leaning in - and Luffy's shorts drop to the deck.

The motion yields several cries of alarm from his crewmates as every man flinches, reeling back.

Sanji's cigarette drops out of his mouth, forgotten.

"Good LORD, Luffy, what did you DO!"

_"I'm gonna be sick."_

Usopp writhes around on the deck, groaning in sympathy pain, his hands between his knees, and Zoro sets his foot back into his boot, his face contorted in a wide grimace. He is now wholly convinced that maybe his _isn't _the worst of the bunch and he is extremely grateful that it isn't as he looks at the wide bruises stretching up the inside of Luffy's thighs. The captain laughs obliviously, his hands on his hips, and tries to explain that he fell earlier and grabbed the mast with his legs - the other men protest and moan and they don't care about the hows or whys or what-the-hells, _he needs to see a DOCTOR, how is he still standing after something like that!_

From the galley, Vivi wonders what they're all making such a fuss about, and Nami wisely doesn't want to know.

-x-

(A/n) And the deep-ish-nes comes to an abrupt end so the stupidity can begin! Word-a-day prompt was BRUISES. Men are strange creatures, and I am not going to apologize for that. 3

-Motcn


	5. you ungrateful bastard

-x-

No Parking On The Battleground  
_you ungrateful bastard_

-x-

"Hey, kelp-head, give me a hand with these."

Sanji leans over the rail in front of the galley, looking down at where they're all sitting at the outside table, and Zoro frowns up at him, his arm draped over the back of his chair and his other hand gripping the handle of his tankard. The look on his face clearly says, _Why should I?_ and Sanji answers the visual inquiry with an uncharacteristic grin at the swordsman, "Get your ass up here. I've got a special one for you."

Sighing, Zoro shoves his chair back and rises, though he doesn't do so with any kind of enthusiasm. He probably suspects this special watermelon is rotten - Nami knows it isn't, and knows he's going to enjoy it, though she only grins at him when he passes by the table and climbs the stairs. Zoro scowls at her over his shoulder, even more suspicious than before, and follows Sanji into the galley. The two of them return with three large watermelons apiece, each more than twenty pounds; they set them out on the table to enthusiastic hoots from Usopp, Luffy, and Chopper, and Sanji starts slicing them into quarters as Zoro drops back into his seat, his arms crossed.

Luffy grabs at one of them while Sanji is preoccupied, intending to bite straight through the rind, and Sanji swiftly kicks him under the table, saying, "That one's not for you, idiot!"

"They're all the same, what's it matter?" Luffy asks stubbornly, his face puckered with indignity.

He clings to the watermelon, frowning at the chef as he rubs his sore shins together.

"It matters, because that one is different and you won't like it." There are several sharp laughs and slaps against the table that beg to differ, but Sanji continues slicing, undaunted, "I know you won't, now put it down. It doesn't have your name on it, does it?"

Eyebrows knotted, Luffy looks down at the watermelon, turning it over in his hands. Usopp is the one who spots the capital letter carved into the dark green, and he points it out, tilting the watermelon back in Luffy's hands, "It's the letter _D."_

"So it _is _mine!"

"No, that stands for _dumbass swordsman,_ now put it down! Here," Sanji says, sliding a platter down the table toward him, piled high with the freshly-sliced fruit, "Have at it."

Luffy does just that, dropping the watermelon into Usopp's open hands and grabbing at the nearest pieces. The cannoneer chuckles and passes the watermelon across the table to Chopper, though it's bigger and heavier than the tiny reindeer and he starts to tip out of his seat under the weight of it. Zoro rights him with one hand, the other slung across the back of his chair again, and Chopper breathes a sigh of relief, heaving the watermelon over to him and grinning, "Here you go, Zoro!"

The watermelon sits in Zoro's palm and he scowls at it, holding it slightly away from his body, as if he expects it to burst. He looks at the chef out of the corner of his eye - Sanji is too busy slicing half a watermelon into delicate triangles for Nami to notice - and then he glowers at the navigator, who is grinning at him again.

"What's wrong with it?" he asks, "You know."

"There's nothing wrong with it," Nami says delightedly.

Sanji points at him with the knife, biting down on his cigarette, "Don't talk to Nami with that rough tone. There's nothing wrong with that watermelon; you're going to eat it and like it, you ungrateful bastard."

Zoro scowls and barks, "Hey, I don't -"

"Look," Sanji says, grabbing the top of the watermelon and raising the knife.

He slices off the top of it, exposing the pink, watery flesh within, freckled with thick black seeds, and the smell that is not just watermelon is enough to knock someone over. Nami can smell if from across the table, and Zoro's eyebrows raise in surprise, his expression slacking in wonder as Sanji straightens, taking the top of the fruit with him. The swordsman doesn't move, staring down at the watermelon and breathing in deep breaths through his nose, filling his lungs with the smell that he knows so well.

"This is beer."

"Not beer, specifically, but yeah," Sanji says, "I've had that in the freezer for about a week."

There's also enough clear rum soaked into it to drop a Neptunian and it's the best watermelon Zoro has ever eaten in his life.

-x-

(A/n) Word-a-day prompt was WATERMELON; this kinda rolls with _"another indulgent bite" _from Pinwheel, because the other one was my original idea and then my cousin Daniel mentioned this and Zoro loves beer and I couldn't not do it. P:

-Motcn


	6. his best stage whisper

-x-

No Parking On The Battleground  
_his best stage whisper_

-x-

Luffy hears it on his way to the bathroom, and in that instant he forgets everything his bladder has been telling him and he cups his hands around his ears. He knows what that noise is, though it's kind of muffled, and he grins as he casts around the empty storage room - well, it's not _empty._ There are crates and boxes, but it's mostly food and some treasure, and the second refrigerator is in the corner, but that's not the source of the noise. Luffy turns on the spot, looking up at the rudder line and the swaying ceiling light.

It's when he glances down at the floorboards that he realizes where it's coming from and Usopp finds him, several minutes later, lying flat against the floor with his head turned to the side, grinning like an idiot. Nothing particularly strange, there, but the cannoneer is curious. He kneels beside Luffy, leaning down on his hands and knees and tilting his head to one side so he can look at him properly, arching an eyebrow.

"What're you doin'?" he asks, whispering because Luffy holds up a single finger and crams the digit against his own face, hissing between his teeth.

"Nami's singin'."

_"What?"_ The word bursts out of him in disbelief, louder than Usopp intends, and he cringes, bowing his head and muttering, _Sorry, sorry,_ when Luffy grimaces at him, his eyes wide. Usopp lays down, pressing his ear against the floor, just like Luffy, and he listens. When he hears it, too, drifting up lightly through the boards, he grins and chuckles. "You're right!"

"I know," Luffy says under his breath, beside himself with glee, "I told you: all pirates sing!"

He turns his head so his other ear is against the floor and Usopp leans up on his elbows to look over his shoulder, using his best stage whisper, _"Chopper!"_ The tiny reindeer comes at the summons, his ears twitching, and he looks at the two of them curiously.

"What're you guys doing?"

"Nami's singin'," Usopp tells him, pointing at the floor.

"Yeah, I can hear it," Chopper says, smiling, and Luffy raises his head in apparent disappointment.

"Man, I bet you can hear it really good, too, without even layin' on the floor," he says, frowning, "You're so awesome!"

"Sh-shut up!"

Luffy grabs Chopper by the face and yanks him to the floor before he can start shouting insults and alert the navigator - she'll yell at them if they're caught eavesdropping, no doubt about that, and yelling and singing are sort of the same thing, but if he had to pick one to listen to, it would obviously be her singing. It doesn't come with pinching or pulling on his face, and it's a lot easier on the ears. Luffy tells Usopp with hushed, bewildered wonder, "She sounds _awesome._ Why won't she sing with us?"

"You're one to judge," the cannoneer says, amused, his face pressed against the floor, "You're completely tone deaf."

"She sings all the time when she's alone in her room," Chopper murmurs helpfully, lying between them with his eyes closed, happy to be included.

"We should start singin' in her room, then!"

"Luffy, he said _alone_ in her room."

"Well, we'll hide somewhere, like behind that bar or under her bed or somethin', and then we'll jump out and start singin' whenever she does! She'll be glad we noticed - y'know you sing when you're happy and stuff."

Naturally, this plan sounds a lot better in theory than it does in execution.

-x-

(A/n) Word-a-day prompt was MUSIC. ...I don't know. xD Thank you guys for the wonderful reviews!

-Motcn


	7. not quite a growl

-x-

No Parking On The Battleground  
_not quite a growl_

-x-

"Tigers are awesome," Luffy says, and there is a deep rumble of appreciation for the comment that vibrates up through his legs and his entire body.

Grinning, the pirate captain lightly bounces his heels off the great beast's sides, listening to the hollow _thu-thumps_ as they beat against the tiger's ribcage and swatting the top of Chopper's hat with his stick. The forest floor is dark and cool, dappled with the occasional swaying patch of sunlight that filters down through the trees, and the tiger's striped hide blends in flawlessly with it's surroundings. It picks it's way along the well-worn path at a leisure pace, bringing up the rear of the meandering group. Walking some distance in front of them, but still within earshot, Sanji grins as well, lighting a new cigarette and briefly illuminating the dimness.

"I dunno," the chef quips, snapping his zippo lighter shut, "I think I prefer cougars."

Zoro lets out a bark of laughter that echoes through the quiet and Usopp chuckles. Chopper laughs because the other men are, even if he doesn't get the joke, but Luffy outright protests, frowning and brandishing his stick, "Tigers are better!"

"You're just sayin' that cause it's givin' you a ride," Usopp says teasingly, walking backwards to look at them.

"And you're just jealous," Luffy declares, raising both his arms, his fists clenched, "Cause it only wants t'give _us_ a ride!"

"I wonder why it's so fond of the captain," Robin says thoughtfully, smiling as she reaches over to scratch behind the giant cat's ears. It cranes it's head toward her, that deep coughing noise that is not quite a growl, not quite a pur rumbling contentedly through it's chest.

Chopper cracks Luffy in the knee with his own stick after the captain rattles the other one between his antlers.

"He says it's because he likes the way Luffy smells."

Grinning, Zoro says, "A carnivore can smell another carnivore."

"I don't care what he smells like, as long as they don't start fighting over a carcass," Nami calls back from the head of the group, her eyebrows knotting, "Make sure he knows there's plenty to eat in his lunch box."

-x-

(A/n) Word-a-day prompt was MEAT. As in, "Luffy smells like meat, so the tiger likes him?" :I

-Motcn


	8. pulling the pipes apart

-x-

No Parking On The Battleground  
_pulling the pipes apart_

-x-

Usopp shifts underneath the cabinet, raising his knees and setting his feet firmly on the floor to take some of the pressure off his back, lifting a gloved hand to the pipe above him. Excess water wells up around the locknut when he grips it between his thumb and forefinger and tries to twist it free. It's too tight and it doesn't give; the water sops into his glove, gathering at the bend in his thumb, and drips, catching him in the eye. Usopp jerks in surprise and shouts, banging his elbow on the side of the small cabinet.

"You alright under there?" Sanji asks, leaning one hand against the counter.

"Yeah, yeah," Usopp says, rubbing his eye with one hand and holding his smarting elbow with the other, "I can't get this off. Hand me a wrench, would ya?"

Straightening up, Sanji glances at the open tool box sitting on the table and the wide array of metal things spread out around it. There are pieces of piping, springs, nails, hammers, screwdrivers, black tape, more gloves, and dozens of other things that the chef couldn't name if he wanted to - there are smudges of rust and oil across his once-clean the table cloth, now, and Sanji sighs as he picks through the tin box, rattling the unfamiliar utensils.

"There are five wrenches, which one do you want?"

"It doesn't matter. Uh... not the little one. This pipe is kinda big," Usopp says, mostly to himself. He wraps his hand around the pipe, but can't completely. His middle finger and his thumb don't meet, and he can fit his other thumb in the empty space between them. "Wider than an inch. There, uh... there should be a wrench that's got an _18_ on the handle, hand me that one."

"I thought it didn't matter," Sanji mutters, putting down one wrench and picking up another.

"Well, I can probably adjust it, just gimme the one you have in your hand."

"No, this one's way too small, hold on. Here."

Sanji sets the wrench in Usopp's open hand and it quickly disappears under the sink with a muffled, "Thanks."

"No problem," Sanji says, crouching down beside the cabinet. He takes a long drag off his cigarette, filling his lungs, and then blows the steady stream of smoke out the corner of his mouth, toward the table, so he doesn't smother the cannoneer. "Need anything else?"

Metal screeches against metal as Usopp finally manages to twist the locknut free and he laughs triumphantly, pulling the pipes apart. He reaches out from under the sink, setting a piece of pipe out by his foot, and Sanji can finally see the hairline crack in the outward bend of it that has made his morning a shitty aggravation. His pots and pans had all been full of dirty water and were starting to form rust this morning when he'd come to make breakfast - he'd left the clean dishes in the drainer last night after washing them (laziness on his part, he's ashamed to admit), so the leak wasn't found until it was too late.

Breakfast is still on the metaphorical back-burner while Mr. Fix-It replaces the pipe, and Luffy is sobbing somewhere out on the deck as his stomach eats at his insides. Usopp gestures upwards, at the table, and says, "I need the other elbow pipe to put in here. The one that's threaded."

Sanji stands and looks at the pipes on the table.

"The what?"

"The _elbow pipe,"_ Usopp says, and lifts the cracked pipe, "Like the one I just took out! It looks like an elbow -"

"No, I mean which one is threaded?"

"Oh - the one you can twist. It's got spirals at the end, that this thing goes on." He holds the locknut up out of the cabinet, between his fingers, and Sanji hands him a threaded pipe. Usopp takes one look at it and tries to hand it back. "I need the quarter bend, not this one!"

"The _what?"_

"The pipe that bends at a 90 degree angle, _like this one_. This doesn't bend far enough to reach the other pipe, see?"

Usopp holds both pipes up beside each other, level with the sink, and it's obvious it isn't going to fit. Sanji sighs a line of smoke, snatching up the old pipe so he can compare, and says, "I'm not a plumber!"

"Well, neither am I!"

"Shit, I know that," Sanji mutters, picking up pipe after pipe. Finally, he finds the right one - identical to the first, without the crack - and drops it into Usopp's waiting hand. He leans back against the counter, his arms crossed. "What do you want for breakfast, Usopp?"

"What? I don't care."

"You like the cinnamon buns with that orange ginger syrup, right?" Sanji says, rubbing his chin thoughtfully and chewing on the end of his cigarette, "I'll make those. And some apple scones. Shit, but I'm nearly out of nutmeg, I think... I'll have to check."

The pipes clank together, "It's fine. Breakfast is breakfast."

"Yeah, whatever," the chef snaps, and steps over him to check the storage room, "Shut up and fix the sink."

-x-

(A/n) Word-a-day prompt was WRENCH. I have an endless amount of amusement for the fact that Sanji doesn't compute things that are not kitchen appliances. Also. I love it when Usopp fixes things~ 3

-Motcn


	9. persistent discomfort

-x-

No Parking On The Battleground  
_persistent discomfort_

-x-

"What an idiot," Nami sighs, her hands on her hips as she toes off her shoes, "You know you're supposed to lift with your_ legs_ not your _back,_ right? That should be pretty basic for someone who spends all day lifting heavy weights."

"Sh-shut up," Zoro growls, his face pressed against the sun-warmed boards. He can't bear to watch - actually, he couldn't watch even if he wanted to, since he's lying on his stomach and that conniving woman is behind him, standing over him. He feels unusually vulnerable sprawled out on the deck like this... "Are you sure you know what you're doing?"

"Of course I do! Don't you trust me?"

She sounds so sweet when she asks, it makes him regret every decision he's ever made up to this point.

"No."

"How rude!"

The sweetness is gone in a heartbeat as she steps up onto his back, her small feet pressing her weight against his spine, and Zoro instinctively tenses. The added weight certainly doesn't hurt - it isn't even a nuisance - but his back seizes up again under his clenched muscles, sending a jolt of pain right between his shoulders. Well, maybe it isn't really _pain_ so much as it's _persistent discomfort,_ but whatever it is, he can't move very well and that's no good... Nami plants her feet firmly, but lightly, standing so that her weight is evenly distributed and her heels aren't digging into his back; something Zoro is surprised to notice when she shifts one foot up along his spine, the other resting on his lower back.

"Well, in any case," she says, smiling, "You can thank me with 150,000฿~"

Zoro groans out between his teeth and lifts his head to glare at the gunwale, his fists clenched, "I should've known! Get the hell off me, you money-grubbing - "

"Loosen up would you? I can't pop your back if your tense like this."

"Never mind, I said to get off!"

"You're not exactly in a bargaining position, and I won't come down _one berri!"_ Nami says adamantly, and brings one foot down firmly against the flat of his back. Zoro grunts, jerking in surprise and tensing up again as his back clenches painfully (yes, _painfully)_. Nami continues, "I'm doing you a favor, you could show a little more appreciation!"

_"If you cripple me... I swear..."_

"I hope you're not insinuating that I'm heavy enough to break your back."

He's swimming in dangerous waters, there. He can hear it in her tone, though he doesn't see how her weight has anything to do with what he said or why it matters in the first place... Zoro lays his forehead back against the deck, squeezing his eyes shut, and grits his teeth, "Just do whatever you're gonna do...!"

"You have to relax first, I already told you that," Nami says, exasperated.

She's asking for the impossible. Her right foot shifts up along his spine, settling between his shoulder blades, where the persistent discomfort is, and her left foot follows it a second later. Zoro forces himself to take three deep breaths and relax.

"Right here?" Nami asks, and bounces lightly for confirmation.

"A little lower," he says, around his teeth.

She shuffles down an inch, the pads of her feet against his bare back.

"Yeah. Right there."

"Ready?"

"No."

"Alright, well, I'm gonna do it anyway."

And that's the only warning that he gets. Nami bounces lightly again, twice, lifting her weight, but not her feet - and the second time she comes down, she shoves with all of her might against his back. There is a loud, unpleasant _crunch_ as Zoro's spine pops back into the right place. It pushes the breath out of him, but the relief is immediate and, honestly, a total surprise. Zoro draws in another breath and lets it out slowly, raising his head again and pressing his hands against the deck to push himself up.

"Wow, that _does _feel better," he says in obvious disbelief as Nami hops off of him and he gets to his feet. He presses his fists against his lower back and leans backward - everything pops and cracks again, the way it's supposed to, and he stretches to the left, then the right, smiling because he can move properly again. "Yeah, that feels great!"

"Worth 150,000฿?" Nami inquires, grinning, and the smile falls from Zoro's face.

"No. You know I don't have any money."

"That's fine, I'm willing to wait," she says, so obliging and sweet, it makes him ill, "You still owe me interest on the sword money you borrowed in Logue Town, anyway, so what's a few hundred thousand more? But take as long as you want! Really! There's no rush, no rush at all~"

He comes to the conclusion, then, as he stands there rubbing his back and Nami saunters away, that she _is_ trying to cripple him in some form or another.

-x-

(A/n) Word-a-day prompt was TORTURE. Updating this sans Pinwheel because I suck and haven't written, just been reading~ CB

-Motcn


	10. a challenge, loud and clear

-x-

No Parking On The Battleground  
_a challenge, loud and clear_

-x-

When Luffy says, _"Sogeking. Shoot down that flag,"_ there is not an ounce of hesitation in him as he draws back the string.

Those words settle in his bones and fill him up. They steady his heart, his hand, and his nerves, and if he has anything else in him in that single, quiet moment when he takes a breath, and shifts his stance, and waits for one heartbeat, it is _faith_. He knows what those words mean and he is still willing to follow that order, willing to believe that things will work out for the best, that it will be worth it, because Luffy is not an idiot, to risk them all with empty words or threats. He has seen Luffy take opponents twice his age, his size, his experience - with the weight of everything on his shoulders, against the most unimaginable odds - and win against them all without fail, every time, _because he has to._

He risks losing everything in those fights, he risks losing his friends, and that is not a bargain that Luffy takes lightly. There is no middle ground. There is victory or the grave for him. There is something that goes wrong and a way to fix it, someone that needs help and a way to save them, and Luffy is all instinct, from the soles of his feet to the ends of his hair. He has a knack for seeing what it is, exactly, that needs to be done. He knows what you have to give and there is no give in him once he sets his mind on something. There is no going back. There is no giving up. Luffy sacrifices endlessly for his friends - his family, his crew - regardless of what it costs him in the end.

Without them he is just one man alone in a boat, with his dreams and his drive and his boundless love. Luffy can love a person instantly, but his love does not come cheap or easy, by any means, and it is the heaviest, lightest, most encompassing thing in the world. For every member of his crew, he has paid a price, because he wanted to and they needed him. Because he is the only one that could. A set of swords for Zoro, (a village for himself), a restaurant for Sanji, a room for Nami, a flag for Chopper, a kingdom for Vivi - a promise for each of them, because Luffy himself is a promise and it is unfathomable that he could break - and now a challenge, loud and clear, to the rest of the world for Robin.

And it says something for the crew that they don't say anything at all. They all love and trust Luffy with their lives; they have left them in his hands before and he has always held them close, walked them to the brink and back, and seen them safely home. Where the captain goes, the crew will follow, because Luffy is the one constant between them. Nami isn't calling him rash or stupid, swinging a fist in his direction; Sanji isn't insisting that he think this one through; Chopper isn't inquiring or raising a panic; and nothing is expected from Zoro, regardless, because if Luffy is the heart of the crew, then Zoro is the backbone and he may bend every now and then, but he is just as unlikely to break.

They all understand. They know what this is - what burning that flag will mean - and they are all so steady and sure, and maybe it says something about himself, as well, that he is standing here with them (and not with them, not really) and he is not afraid. Maybe it says something (despite this), that he is the one that delivers the blow and burns the flag on the Tower of Law, at the end of the world. Maybe he's listening, really listening, and maybe he hopes that Robin hears it, too, because they're giving everything for her.

Maybe he knows this, most of all, because he very nearly lost it:

That all they have is each other. And their love.

And what is the World, compared to that?

-x-

(A/n) Enies Lobby feels all over the place. No prompt.

-Motcn


	11. several small portions

-x-

No Parking On the Battleground  
_several small portions_

-x-

Sanji has worked in a seafaring restaurant over half of his life, so feeding a large crowd is nothing he's never dealt with before (and this crowd seems to be getting bigger with every island they disembark on). It's actually something he thrives on. If he didn't love being in the kitchen, he wouldn't be in this crew, and he wouldn't trade them off for anything - save the shitty swordsman, though you couldn't get more than a head of cabbage for his lazy, directionless ass, even on a good day. It took him a while to get into the swing of sustaining an appetite as vast and unrelenting as Luffy's, but it was a welcome challenge.

By the time they set sail on the Sunny, months have passed, and Sanji has all but perfected his schedule.

Breakfast is big meal number one, bright and early with the entire crew once the anchor is raised and the sails are set. Requests are usually taken the night before (Ladies only, but more often than not everyone has something to say about it), revised during preparations because sleep tends to change everyone's mind. Something warm and filling to get the day started - usually light and sweet, but not too sweet - something that won't linger on the pallet.

Brunch falls a short hour or two after the first meal; Luffy has dubbed it "second-breakfast" and Sanji thinks that he can call it whatever he wants, even if it's something stupid, because he's typically the only one that eats it. Occasionally, marimo will put in a gruff request, as well, which Sanji will decline on principle, but fix, anyway. Consists of several small portions (that go well with beer), packed with protein and greens (whether Luffy likes it or not), because those two idiots burn so much energy.

Lunch is in the early afternoon, with everyone at the table. Sanji tends to plan this meal in advance, sometimes as early as the day before, because there are two-to-three courses that come with it and there are dozens of tiny elements that go into each dish for each person. Relies heavily on what he has in the store room or freezer at the time, what the others drag in from the sea, and what they (the Ladies) are in the mood for; starter is usually a light soup, if the weather is cool enough.

Tea - "second-lunch" - is cakes, cookies, sandwiches, or anything else small and snack-related that Sanji can make to tide the yammering masses (Luffy, Usopp, and Chopper) over a few extra hours. Occasionally, when the madness strikes him, he tries to do something fun (and _simple_, _very simple,_ that even those idiots can't screw up) that will occupy their time, as well as their stomachs, to keep them from annoying the Ladies too much. There is tea and coffee for Nami and Robin respectively, served at their leisure (provided he isn't supervising the children).

Dinner is the last main meal of the day, and definitely the largest and rowdiest, with a minimum of three (maximum of five) courses. Meat, meat, and more meat (Sanji thinks, sometimes, that there are just not enough fish in the sea to last Luffy an entire lifetime), and Sanji prepares everything around the previous meals of the day. The spectrum of possibilities where food is concerned is wide and glorious - not unlike the smooth, outward curve of a Lady's hips - and every good chef (and every good man) knows you follow that subtle path. It's unsettling to just jump around from spicey to sweet, from cold to hot, from light to hearty, and Sanji refuses to make an unsettling meal.

Finally, there is a "midnight snack" that will actually be eaten anywhere between midnight and two in the morning, depending on if there's dessert with dinner, because it is impossible for Luffy to go more than 5-to-8 hours without a meal. The kitchen and crew tend to suffer when he does. Sanji is in the midst of searing thick slices of unfortunate-Neptunian (marinated in his special barbeque sauce since they wrestled it from the sea) for the captain's nightly lunchbox when Franky leans into the galley, his hands on his hips.

Sanji glances up at him, and the cyborg straightens out of the inquisitive pose, "Thought I smelled somethin' good. You cookin' again, twirly-brows?"

Somehow, that only sounds like an insult when the swordsman is saying it.

"That stomach with legs will eat again before breakfast," Sanji says, shifting a spatula through the meat and sparse vegetables communing in the skillet. It feels good to be in a kitchen again, and he doesn't mind the extra work.

_"Again?"_ Franky asks incredulously, leaning an elbow against the bar. He seems to reconsider as he settles into his seat. "Can't say I'm surprised, I guess. But we just left my hometown behind earlier today, and this is the fourth meal I've seen you make since then - you're gonna wear this kitchen out, man."

He seems delighted with the prospect, and Sanji chuckles.

"I'd rather Luffy not try to chew through the door on that nice new freezer right away."

"Ah, I think it'll hold up against him," the shipwright says, grinning, with nothing but faith in his handiwork.

"You haven't seen him when he's hungry," Sanji says, matching the grin. He lifts the skillet off the stove, holding it out to the side as he stoops to retrieve a deep bento box out of one of the bottom cabinets (has he mentioned how much he loves all this cabinet - not to mention _counter_ - space?). He shakes the skillet and flicks his wrist as he straightens, the contents lurking upwards, flipping, and tucking back into the skillet with a renewed sizzle. Sanji sets the bento box up on the counter in front of Franky, tapping it lightly against the tiles. "This right here will save us both a lot of grief. I promise."

He glances into his skillet, this time shakes everything around again under an assessing eye, and then transfers the steaming chunks of broad meat, hidden vegetables, and thick barbeque sauce into the bento box with one scrape of the spatula. The skillet is returned to the hot eye and Sanji takes the time to turn his sleeves up again, where they've started to slip from his elbows. He arches an eyebrow at Franky, reaching across the counter for the massive bowl of remaining marinated-Neptunian.

"You want one?"

"Hm?"

"You want a midnight snack box?"

Franky grins.

"Sure, why not!" he says, striking a half-pose on the bench, with his arms thrust out to one side, "My appetite is super this week! Throw some cheese in there for me, too, would you, bro? And those string potatoes you made for lunch."

"You got it," Sanji says, and the meat sizzles in the skillet.

-x-

(A/n) Sanji and cooking again and LOOK, YAY, FRANKY (who I'm still trying to get a proper handle on; I keep hearing Cave Johnson's very-American voice in my head because I don't really have a voice to stick with Franky yet (Japanese VA aside) and I don't know how I feel about it. It's amusing, at least, and hopefully passable~ xD)! Renewed and steady updates for a while, with apologies for the slack. I'm all caught up with the manga, guys! Finally. C:

So potential-spoilers a-hoy for those who aren't~ (damn, it just feels so good to say that)

-Motcn


	12. residual bursts

-x-

No Parking on the Battleground  
_residual bursts_

-x-

They've been gone from Drum Island for only a day, now, and they are still near enough to get some residual bursts of the steady, cold weather that Chopper knows he is going to miss. The snow falls thick and heavy, disappearing into the churning ocean waves and settling on the deck. Usopp is the only one with sense enough to bundle up before he and Luffy burst out into the high drifts, laughing and shouting and rolling in the freshly-laid snow that is already gathering around their knees. Chopper follows them a bit more slowly, enjoying the cool air.

Admittedly, he's still kind of hesitant about joining in.

So, he sits contentedly on the sidelines for a while, where Zoro is leaned up against the gunwale taking a nap (even though Chopper has tried without results to wake him and ask him to go inside, before he catches a cold or frostbite), and the tiny reindeer smiles and giggles quietly to himself as he watches Usopp and Luffy.

That is, until he notices the snow Usopp is pilling up start to take a more defined shape, and Luffy patting together a bunch of snow of his own, jamming a stick down into the side of it once he's satisfied it's the right size. Luffy laughs, pointing at Usopp's sculpture, and says it looks stupid, and Usopp tells him that he just can't appreciate this sort of thing and that his snowman is too lumpy and not intimidating at all - he realizes what they're doing, and they're obviously having so much fun, and Chopper's heart beats a little faster the longer he watches. He slips off the gunwale, using the snoring swordsman's shoulder as a stepladder, and he bounds across the snowy deck.

"Luffy," he says beathlessly, pausing on the other side of the soon-to-be snowman that is already twice his size, though it's only half-finished. Luffy leans over the top of it, grinning down at him, and Chopper taps his hooves together, lightly, and gathers the courage to grin back and say, "I... I've always wanted to build a snowman... with my friends!"

Luffy chuckles, "Well, go ahead, dummy, there's plenty of snow~"

He sets up another ball of snow, this one smaller and lumpier than the one underneath, and Luffy has to mash it down quite a bit before it decides to sit where he wants it to. Chopper hesitates, shuffling his feet in the snow, and then he comes around the snowman to stand between Luffy and Usopp.

"Could..." Chopper pipes up, and they look at him again as he turns to look at both of them, "Could we build one... together? Could the three of us build a snowman together?"

Luffy grins again, broader than ever - but Usopp is the one who answers.

He stands, tall and imposing, declaring with great, enthusiastic authority, _"Of course we can!"_ The sharpshooter scrambles out of the way with a yelp of surprise as Luffy hefts his own snowman up with a roar, in all it's lumpy, bulky glory, and hurls it at Usopp's delicate sculpture-of-a-lady-at-sea. The two crumble down together, Usopp skidding aside in the snow, and Luffy laughs loudly, doubling over, his bare hands scooping out another ball of snow and packing it together.

"Let's make a great big one, then," the captain says.

"Can we put a hat on it when we're finished?" Chopper asks eagerly, trying to pack a bunch of snow on his own with his small hooves, "And a pipe? And a carrot for the nose?"

"We'll give him a scarf, too!" Usopp says, brushing the snow off his parka, cool and nonchalant, "Don't want him to get cold!"

"That's brilliant, Usopp!" Chopper says, beaming, with stars in his eyes.

Luffy shows him how to start a snowball rolling properly; Usopp shows him how to smooth and pack the edges, so it doesn't fall apart. And the snowman they end up with is nothing like what Chopper has ever imagined before (and he has privately imagined it for a long, long time). It is wide and lumpy - despite his and Usopp's attempts to smooth it out - adorned with Usopp's scarf, the stick-arms from Luffy's previous snowman, and a bunch of button's secretly and unwisely taken off one of Nami's many blouses. It's taller than the galley deck, and Chopper has to stand on his toes in "heavy point" in order to place the straw-hat on top of it's head while Usopp and Luffy stand on the deck below, grinning and looking accomplished.

Chopper smiles behind his hands, and he thinks - he _knows_ - that this is the best snowman. Ever.

Even after Sanji comes out of the galley, idly trailing smoke, and puts his cigarette through it's face for obstructing the Ladies' view.

-x-

(A/n) I get the feeling that Chopper watched a lot of village kids building snowmen together. Y'know, because I like to depress myself like that (even though that really isn't that depressing, but I feel OnePiece things through an amplifier, so...).

-Motcn


	13. absolutely not

-x-

No Parking on the Battleground  
_absolutely not_

-x-

Zoro is willing to go a few days without food.

It happens sometimes when you're at sea; no sense in worrying about it.

But he is not going to go without beer, too.

No.

Absolutely not.

Beer without food is fine, and food without beer is a nuisance, but atleast there's something in your stomach - but not both at once.

Zoro comes up from below deck that morning, knowing there isn't going to be any breakfast and that he drank up the last of his beer the night before, and he crosses over to where Usopp is crouched by the gunwale with his tackle box and the captain. (The useless love-cook is busy rifling through their supplies, again, to see if he can at least scrounge up anything for Nami, but Zoro doesn't get his hopes up in that regard.) Usopp yawns widely and rubs his eyes, but his fingers are as sure as ever as he ties a new hook to the end of his line. Luffy stands over him, stiffling a yawn of his own and waiting to be handed a fishing pole.

"Y'know, we could probably catch something if you wouldn't eat all the bait, Luffy," the sharpshooter is saying, not for the first time, looking meaningfully over his shoulder, "How you can stomach all those worms and bugs, though, is completely beyond me... I mean, I'm hungry, but I don't think I'm _that_ hungry."

"They don't squirm as much once you get 'em down," Luffy says dejectedly, and rubs his empty stomach, because that was yesterday's meal-of-desperation and now they're down to forbidden tangerines and he doesn't know how forgiving Nami is feeling today.

Usopp grimaces, shaking his head, but doesn't comment, focused as he is on knotting the hook properly so it doesn't slip off if they do happen to catch something. Zoro comes to stand beside them, then, propping his three swords up against the gunwale.

"Get me a rope, would you, Usopp?"

"A rope?" Usopp asks, bewildered, looking up at him and raising an eyebrow.

He sets his fishing pole down, making sure to lay the hook back in the tackle box so some idiot (Luffy) doesn't step on it, and then goes into the forecastle to find some extra rope. Zoro kicks off his boots, pulling off his shirt, then haramaki, and Luffy brightens up considerably as he takes his white sword and steps up onto the gunwale.

"Zoro, you gonna fish with us?"

"_I'm _fishing. You're gonna pull it up."

"Only if you don't forget which way is up when you get down there," Luffy says, grinning, but he's shaking with anticipation because he knows there's going to be breakfast this morning, regardless of whether Zoro gets lost or not.

-x-

(A/n) I _was_ going to include Chopper (as bait lol), but I kept getting hung-up on dialogue that wasn't going to go anywhere except to deviate from where I originally wanted, so pre-GrandLine-ish seems like a good enough place for this! Also, if you guys have any requests or prompts, throw them my way. No promises, but food-for-thought and all that~

-Motcn


	14. very sturdy dudes

-x-

No Parking on the Battleground  
_very sturdy dudes_

-x-

One thing Franky loves about his crewmates:

They are very sturdy dudes.

I mean, with metal hands, you gotta be careful, you know? Watch where your hands are going, don't move too fast, don't grip too hard, sometimes it's better to just avoid the more delicate stuff altogether. Franky can't tell you how many things he's broken just by not paying attention, especially in the beginning. At this point, though, it's pretty much instinct; he doesn't even have to think about it. He wields his body with the same easy, careful skill with which he wields the tools of his craft, and with the very same thought in mind.

_I am not gonna hurt someone that means something to me._

That's what he finds so awesome in the Strawhats - the three power-houses, in particular, because, man, are they crazy-strong - Franky knows he couldn't hurt them, even if he wanted to, even if he loosens up a bit and doesn't hold back.

He can high-five his captain with as much strength as he wants, and it won't just be that weird, rubbery hand that absorbs the impact and returns it with all kinds of enthusiasm. He can bump shoulders with the swordsman without knocking the man off his feet, and can always expect a grunt and an elbow-shove in return. He can clap the twirly-browed cook across the back for making a great meal and not worry about cracking his shoulder-blades, getting a Yeah-I-know-it-shut-up-and-eat grin no matter how heavy his hand falls. He can wrestle with the sharp-shooter and the little doctor dude (when he's not even in his big gorilla form) on those good-weather days, and not always come out the victor.

With the girls, it's a little different. They fall into the "more delicate stuff" category, but Franky doesn't go out of his way to avoid them - that would be plain stupid, wouldn't it? Nico Robin is not the type you rough-house with or jostle playfully at the table, anyway, but Nami-sis is the rowdy, dictating type of little girl that likes to be heard and _will _be heard, even if she has to rough you up in the process. She punches all of them without restraint - and it actually hurt quite a lot, that iron fist of hers - and Franky lets her, because he has heard from the others (from Sanji, Usopp, and Chopper, and even from Nico Robin) that Nami is second, only under Zoro.

But Franky doesn't mind at all. He likes that.

It makes him feel Super - a rough, weird, I'm-not-the-biggest-bro-here kind of Super, but Super nonetheless.

And he really, really likes that.

-x-

(A/n) Franky! Because I need to write him more~ Metal fingers and sensory issues came to mind thanks to _akurosa _and her (wonderful) depressing shit (which you should go read, _this is the price that has been paid in full_ - gogogo), so I produced this.

-Motcn


	15. on the exhale

-x-

No Parking On The Battleground  
_on the exhale_

-x-

Nami notices Sanji smoking and keeping busy instead of eating during meals one too many times.

She knows they're running low on supplies - because they've been at sea for weeks now, and because _a certain someone _has to eat five meals a day, with snacks in between - but they've caught fish recently, and there is still plenty of food on the table when he cooks, though the meals are considerably smaller than normal. It isn't _every_ meal, _every_ day, but it's more than once; often enough for her to notice, and often enough for that sinking, aching familiarity to settle in her chest.

She watched Belle-mere doing the very same thing.

The first time, Nami only observes it in passing. Sanji spends the meal going back and forth between the galley and the outside table, fetching coffee for Robin, or tea for her - swearing at the men when they ask for something and going to get it, anyway - or retrieving an (increasingly rare) ornate dessert from the bolted refrigerator where Luffy's greedy fingers can't reach. Nothing out of the ordinary there, except that he doesn't take the time to sit and enjoy the meal, himself.

The third or fourth time she notices it is when it really bothers her, and she watches him closely to be sure her suspicions are even founded. Maybe she's just imagining it... Maybe she's reading too much into it. Sanji sits at the table with them, laughing and talking with the others. The only thing in front of him is an ashtray and he smokes a handful of cigarettes down to the filter, but he doesn't eat anything. When Luffy's arm gropes around him for Zoro's unattended steak, Sanji grins and slides the plate out from under _marimo _and toward the perpetually-hungry captain while Zoro is saying something to Usopp.

Breakfast, days later, is the final straw. Nami is glaring at her plate after Sanji sets it on the table in front of her, beaming, "Just the way you like~" and she turns the expression on him as he straightens out of the gentlemanly bow. Some of the earnest delight slips out of his expression, giving way to concern because he knows he's done something to upset her. He probably thinks it's about the way her ham-and-cheese omelet is prepared and that makes her even angrier.

"Something wrong, Nami?" he asks.

"Yes," she says angrily, and her tone draws the attention of everyone at the table (which is set for six when there are seven of them, and she swears on the inside that she is never going to sit at a table set for one-less again), "Why aren't you eating?"

The question hangs in the air - an unwanted phantom, because it's clear she doesn't just mean _this meal_, she means _all the others, too_ - and Sanji takes a long drag off his cigarette, his hand hiding most of his face and his eyes on the ceiling. On the exhale, he says, around the smoke, "I've been eating," and it doesn't convince anyone, even though he grins and raises his shoulders. This gives him away completely, because, _"I was going to, Nami."_ or _"What do you mean, Nami?"_ would have both been better, honest, suspicion-alieving answers and Nami opens her mouth to tell him this - to her complete surprise, Zoro beats her to it, lifting his tankard off the table and not even looking at the cook.

"No, you haven't," he says.

"Shut up and drink your beer, marimo," Sanji growls at him.

Zoro shrugs his shoulders and does just that. Luffy bangs his fists on the table, rattling the full plates, and frowns indignantly at the chef, "You've been eating between meals, but I can't!" He's missed the conversation, due to stuffing his face. Sighing, Usopp puts an exasperated hand on his shoulder.

"Luffy, he's obviously lying."

"What? You're lying?"

"No, no, _Sanji_ is lying."

"Oh," the captain says, his frown deepening.

"Now that I think about it," Chopper says tentatively, looking at Sanji, as well, "I've hardly seen you eat anything at all the last couple of days. Are you feeling alright?"

"I'm fine," Sanji snaps, "I've been eating - "

"When?" Nami demands.

He doesn't answer right away, chewing agitatedly on his cigarette, and Robin interjects before he can, in her polite, smiling tone, "This is silly, cook."

Nami points to the cabinets, not so much as glancing at her untouched plate, and there's something in the furious, calm way she tells him to, "Go get a plate, _now."_ that maybe jogs his memory. He pauses, long enough to snuff his cigarette out in the ashtray and breathe the rest of the smoke from his lungs, and he gets another plate down. Nami watches him warily, to be sure he piles his plate high and to be sure he doesn't push it off at Luffy - who is wholly satisfied that the situation, whatever it is, has been resolved and has returned to his own breakfast with gusto - and she makes him sit on the bench beside her.

Sanji takes the seat, quiet and obliging, smiling apologetically, "Sorry, Nami."

"Don't let it happen again," she says, still watching him as she picks up her own fork.

"Yes, ma'am."

"I mean it."

"Yes, ma'am."

-x-

(A/n) Kind of on the late side, I don't venture into internet very often anymore. OTL Aand this... didn't do what I wanted it to (damn these things for having a life of their own sometimes!) so I feel like I should explain it because I'm not sure if the idea is clear enough: I do _not_ think of Sanji as having an eating complex, I just think he knows what it's like to starve and he wouldn't want anyone else to know the feeling - this is already axiomatic, but I can see him maybe, without really thinking about it, going that extra mile and not eating every once in a while when supplies are low in favor of being sure the others get plenty (because he does secretly love those shitty bastards). So, yeah. I don't know.

Also, I'm having _the hardest time_ trying to not write "Nami-SAN", because I'm reading the scanlations again and they're perforated with japanese (which the Haki names confuse the holyFUCK out of me, now, because they all sound the same, really how hard is it to translate those words? I think scanlators are just being lazy - empty or repeating speech bubbles, or bubbles where the dialogue has obviously been put in the wrong place, are a clear testament to that. I'm just saying, maybe spend a little less time working on those elaborately-colored panels you cram up at the beginning or end of the chapter and more time on your translations. Thanks.). Anyway... Sanji's dialogue just seems empty without that deference, but (obviously) I'm not japanese, or writing in japanese, so I don't want to use the japanese idioms because... I'm not japanese. Still, Nami-san's a hard one to shake.

ALSO THANK YOU GUYS for all the wonderful reviews! C: They tickle me into BIG BIG SMILES EVERY TIME I READ THEM - I'm glad I manage to stay in-character and keep these interesting, and that someone is enjoying them! I'm sorry I can't shut up, though, ohmygod.

-Motcn


	16. higher? wire?

-x-

No Parking on the Battleground  
_higher? wire?_

-x-

Luffy is laughing.

"Awesome~ It's so big!"

_"I know,"_ Usopp says, his shoulders shaking with barely-suppressed mirth as he cranes forward to get a better look. Slowly, he lifts one hand, index finger extended. "How can he not notice it climbing all over his face like that? Priceless. Where's a camera when you need one, huh?"

"We should move it," Chopper says nervously, looking at the others, "What if it's poisonous?"

"Then you'll make an antidote, right? We've got it right here if it bites him or something."

"We should get the net!"

Nami comes over to investigate as Robin, chuckling, disappears below deck.

"What are you three looking at?" Nami asks, planting her hands on her hips and frowning. She spots the person of their attention - and what is adorning his face - immediately and shrieks, lurching back. _"What the hell is that?!"_

Luffy laughs again, straightening up and pointing, "It's a spider, duh! Can't you tell?"

And so it is - though Nami thinks, wildly, that calling it a _"spider"_ in that off-handed, stupid way is _the biggest understatement of the century._ The eight-legged creature is easily the size of her entire hand, fingers spread, and it's perched on the left side of Zoro's face. _He's sleeping, _and he hasn't even noticed, despite the gathering crowd leaning in and giggling over him. The swordsman's mouth is hanging open and he's snoring as soundly as ever, and the spider twitches a little when Usopp nudges it with his fingers, positively _beaming._

Nami thinks she might faint.

She fans herself lightly, her face contorted in a grimace.

"I know what it is, Luffy!" she says harshly, already retreating across the deck. That spider is too close for comfort - _What if it can jump or something? She wouldn't doubt it, with those long, hairy, crooked legs? UGH!_ - and Nami shudders, hugging her arms. "Get rid of it!"

Her voice is, of course, what rouses the swordsman - that, or it's Usopp, who has been leaning over him for some time now and suddenly shifts, so the sun falls directly across Zoro's face. He grunts, then slowly opens his eyes, squinting at the surrounding group. The spider has crept toward his left temple, hugging his hairline, but it is just out of sight, even from Zoro's peripheral vision. He doesn't know what they're all gawking at and asks, grumpily, "What?"

Luffy bursts out laughing, pointing at his face, but before he can say anything, Usopp clamps his hand over Luffy's mouth.

"You should go check the galley, Zoro!"

"What?" he asks, frowning.

He shifts his gaze to Nami, who is standing behind the mast. She's waving her arms silently, making some weird, unattractive face at him and pointing emphatically with both hands to her own face, mouthing what looks like... _Higher? Wire?_ Crazy woman. ...Maybe she's having a stroke or something and she's trying to get Chopper's attention. Zoro glances down to find the little reindeer staring up at him with wide, nervous eyes, his hooves clamped over his mouth.

Zoro raises his hand to touch the side of his face, "What -?"

Usopp grabs his hand before he can bring it up completely, and tries (valiantly) to pull the swordsman to his feet.

"To the galley! C'mon, c'mon, hurry!"

Laughing, Luffy joins in, grabbing his other wrist and chanting, "Hurry, hurry! It's gonna be great!" He actually succeeds in pulling Zoro up off the deck, with a bit too much enthusiasm. Stumbling under the momentum as Usopp and Luffy let him go, Zoro moves towards the stairs, throwing a bewildered look over his shoulder as Chopper skitters out of his path and Nami (with a muffled squeal) disappears around the mast.

So Zoro goes into the galley, keenly aware of Usopp and Luffy grinning and watching from below, with their hands cupped around their ears.

He looks at the cook and asks, roughly, "Did you want something or what?"

There's a deep skillet bubbling on the stove, and Sanji devotes his attention to stirring whatever it is before he even bothers to glance at the swordsman. His eyes are narrowed in irritation, a cigarette between his teeth, and he raises an eyebrow, "Why the hell would I -"

He stops, though, and flinches, and strangled noise caught in his throat - and Zoro flinches, too, alert and tense in an instant because the cook never flinches away from him, not even when they're fighting - he has never, _never flinched_ - and Zoro would find more room to wonder _what the hell is going on _if there wasn't a sudden, hot, _blinding_ pain in his left temple as the cook swings his arm toward him. He has time to register that, though - his arm, _not his leg_.

-x-

Zoro wakes up on the floor of the galley - he recognizes the familiar boards against his back at once - but doesn't open his eyes to verify this because his head is _screaming_ at him to go back to sleep. _Sleep will make it better. And maybe a beer, but that would mean getting up..._ His ears are ringing, but listening to Luffy's voice helps a little, so Zoro remains as he is, breathing slow to ease the ache in his head, and tries to get his bearings.

"That wasn't funny," Luffy is saying, quiet and steady, "Sorry, Sanji."

A rough hand pats the side of his face, then (Chopper murmurs, from a distance, _"Luffy, be easy!"_), and Zoro is suddenly aware that the _other_ side of his face, his left cheek and ear and temple, feels hot - _cold, too, that's an odd combination_ - and raw, like someone's tried to rub his skin off with one of the cook's cheese graters. He grimaces, hoping the movement is small enough to go unnoticed, and feels something tug lightly on his cheek, the slightest resistance and heaviness.

It must be a cold compress or something, which accounts for one sensation, at least.

"Your damn right it wasn't funny," the cook says angrily, and there is a tiny shudder in his voice that makes Zoro frown slightly, though he still doesn't look, "I fucking hate those things!"

Usopp is chuckling, half-hearted and nervous, trying to lighten the mood.

"Yeah, but we didn't think you'd go after it with a hot skillet."

And that would account for another sensation, and the screaming pain in his head.

Damn cook.

On his other side, across from where Luffy is sitting, Zoro hears someone shift and a finger tapping against glass - he thinks it's probably a jar, because it sounds hollow. A page turns, the noise a small fluttering in his ear, and then Robin says softly, "Captain, I believe this is your little spider friend, yes?" The book is passed over his head, blocking the light for a brief second before Luffy takes it and drops it onto Zoro's shoulder. It's surprisingly heavy for a book, and it smells old.

"Yup, that's it, alright~ Well, I guess it's kinda Zoro's friend, seeing as it was crawling all over his face."

The final piece of the puzzle, then. Zoro takes a slow, deep breath and lets out a sigh through his nose - there is that hand, patting his face again, "Huh? Zoro, you awake?" _("Luffy, what did I tell you! You'll knock the compress off!")_ and he ignores it, thinking it would be better to just continue his nap.

"I tried to warn him," Nami finally pipes up, with clear exasperation, "Honestly. The big idiot didn't get what I was trying to say at all! ...Sanji, you were burned pretty badly, too, your arm doesn't hurt, does it?"

"No, Nami~ Not as much as seeing a perfectly good chowder wasted."

And Zoro wonders, not for the first time, why he feels so at ease sleeping around these people.

-x-

(A/n) BAM another update! Aaand don't know. Usopp and Luffy just wanted to hear Sanji scream like a girl (because that's always fun). Fun-fact about chowder; it is illegal - ILLEGAL - in Maine to use tomatoes in clam-chowder. That is a real thing that you can go to jail for. In Maine.

-Motcn


	17. but it is not enough

-x-

No Parking on the Battleground  
_but it is not enough_

-x-

It breaks Robin's heart when Luffy suddenly pulls away from her.

And not in the same way that it breaks her heart to watch Usopp, the self-proclamed weakest among them, throwing Zoro over his shoulder to carry his injured comrade away; knowing that she will not see the swordsman stand again, once he falls; watching Brook shield the first friends he has found in so many years to stand in the sun with; seeing how desperate Sanji is to save at least someone, to not even listen to his captain's desperate pleas.

Luffy is begging them to run, and no one is willing to do it if it means leaving someone behind, and he cannot bear to watch anymore.

That angry red coils off of him, heating his blood, and he screams as he moves. The desperation is clear on his face and in his voice - he is angry and he is afraid - and that makes Robin angry and afraid, because she knows he isn't going to make it. She wants to have faith in Luffy - _that is the only thing Usopp has ever asked of her and she hears the echo of it, even now, muffled behind that silly mask, over the clatter of the train,_

_"Have faith in Luffy."_

Like he is an unstoppable force.

Robin thinks he should be. Luffy is an unstoppable force, when there is someone that he loves behind him, when there is someone to protect. But Robin grasps at her faith, and reality tears it away from her. She wants him to be able to save them, but she knows that he won't.

_(Faith will not make him stronger or faster than he is; it will not make his opponents weaker, or slower._

_Faith will not bring the others back.)_

And she is right.

Luffy doesn't make it to Franky, but he is _so close._ Close enough, before he is cast so easily aside, to see the determination she knows must be on the shipwright's face as he charges Kuma in his captain's stead - if he is going to go down, it will be paving the way for someone else to escape, but it is not enough.

And - no - he does not even make it to Nami, though she reaches for him and calls out to him, and is only an arm's-length away if he only had the time or strength to reach back. Luffy's wounds are catching up with him; he staggers and chokes, and the navigator's name is wrenched, deep and dark, from his lungs, and it is the saddest cry yet because Nami has asked for his help, and there is nothing he can do to save her.

It dawns on Robin, then, that she should go.

It wouldn't be selfish, would it? To go? That's what Luffy is telling her to do _(she has heard that desperate tone before, when everything was burning, and this isn't Ohara, but she's losing everything she loves again, isn't she?)_. Any other time or place, with any other people, Robin wouldn't have even hesitated - she would have been the first to slip away, unnoticed in the chaos - but Chopper is killing himself to protect friends that are no longer here to protect, and like every Strawhat before her, Robin can't bring herself to leave him. He roars and thrashes, reaching after enemies that he can no longer see or distinguish, and he won't even know that he has failed until it's too late.

It will break his heart.

And it breaks _her _heart, because it is far too late for all of them.

The doctor is gone - Kuma is standing among the rubble, too close to her - with one final, terrible roar, and in the sudden quiet that falls in it's place, another rises up, like thunder shuddering against the world, _"STOP IT! STOP IT, STOP IT, STOP IT!"_ It's the only thing he can say. That hand comes toward her, palm wide open, and Robin realizes in that brief instant that she has done something terrible to Luffy - the very thing that she has done to countless others before him.

She has left him, alone.

And Luffy does not deserve that.

-x-

(A/n) Randomly Robin, for the flying-scene. Because... ofmyfeelings.

-Motcn


	18. talus a story

-x-

No Parking on the Battleground  
_talus a story_

-x-

The trees on the lawn were not made for climbing.

Clearly.

The leaves shake noisily as Chopper tries to extricate himself from the clinging, stubborn branches. He pushes away from the trunk of the tree, using both hooves to get some leverage over his head so he can pull without losing his seating; his horns are snagged, though, and the effort only gives him a headache. Sighing, Chopper slips his hooves up underneath his hat, rubbing at the base of his antlers. Maybe if he could reach the branches, he could pry them apart, but his arms are too short. And he could always try shifting into "heavy point" - it isn't like it's very far to fall - but he doesn't want to break the branches if he can avoid it.

"Chopper," Brook pipes up from beside him, "Might I say, you make a lovely hornament._ Yohoho!_ If only I could say the same for myself!"

The skeleton has managed to slip his slender bones in between exactly the right branches to get himself stuck, as well, though his feet (swinging merrily) are only a foot off the ground, at most. He looks comfortable enough, considering their position.

Chopper giggles, grinning.

"Don't worry, Brook," he says, giving his antlers another tentative tug, "I'm sure you'll femur comfortable once we get down from here."

"Ah! Deer me, another bone joke! Doctor, I'm afraid I'll have to rein you in if you keep this up!"

"Why don't you talus a story to pass the time, then?"

"_Yohoho!_ Well, I'm certainly not as enthralling as Usopp, but if you cantlern from the best, you cantlern at all!"

The two of them laugh, and the branches shake with mirth.

There is silence on the lawn for a while.

"Hhmm," the skeleton hums thoughtfully, and then is deeply serious as he turns to his tiny, captive companion, "I can hardly believe it, but it appears to be true. Chopper. I think we may have stagnated a bit."

-x-

(A/n) Oh, come on, Chopper would be _very good _at bone jokes once he got into the swing of it (DOCTOR) and Brook is a punny bastard, anyway. xD Ched told me someone should be "stuck in a tree", so I wrote this stupid shit~ I'm trying to get one-shot stuff finished for NaNoWriMo, but so far I'm failing at the word-count and I get too easily distracted by things...

-Motcn


	19. vines climbing toward the sun

-x-

No Parking on the Battleground  
_vines climbing toward the sun_

-x-

He does not expect to meet her at sea, but one day he finds her stepping across his path.

Not _standing in his way; _she has never done that.

She has always been a welcome challenge - a tide he could push himself against, that will always push back - a promise he intends to keep, a title she intends to win - and they have made each other stronger in time. They are both following different, steady paths to the same destination and every once in a while, like vines climbing toward the sun, they intersect. He doesn't even have to ask. The invitation is in the way she breathes and moves, calm and steady; the casual shift of her hips, her palm resting on the hilt of her white sword as she turns slightly aside and tilts up her chin with the faintest expectant smile. _Well? I'm waiting on you, Zoro._

Their swords clash, steel sliding against steel, generating sparks as they glance aside. Even with only one sword against his three, she is an even match for him - and he is not a boy, anymore, struggling to keep apace with her - and she is not a girl, struggling to come to terms with herself. Where he is strong and broad-shouldered, she is slim, and sleek, and swift, and she turns his blows aside and slips between his defenses with an expert grace and skill that she has spent years perfecting, and he has spent years anticipating.

She breaks his guard, and he builds it back up.

He cuts to the right, and she swings to the left.

She turns, and he turns with her.

And they meet again, face to face, their blood and breath and sweat mingling as they come together.

Neither of them ever lose - and neither of them win.

It has been that way for years, now, and when they disengage that final time - when they both relent that there is no ground to gain here, that they are both strong enough - Kuina sheathes her precious sword and then she smiles at him. It isn't the sad, teary smile from before, when they were kids, this smile is big and familiar - just pride and unrelenting joy - and it is an expression and feeling that Zoro mirrors instinctively. She says something to him, then, still bright and vivid, and Zoro hears his name -

Only it's not her saying it this time, it's someone else.

Someone who smacks his shoulders and his face, and shakes him roughly, and says his name again, loudly, laughing in the dark.

There is that big, familiar grin.

"Zoro! Zooooro, come sleep on watch with me! C'mon, it's nice outside~"

The swordsman groans as he sits upright, shoving Luffy out of his face. The bunk swings, rocking with the tide as it pushes gently against the ship and reminding him of where he is, and who he is with. His voice is like gravel as he rubs the sleep from his eyes with the heel of his hand, "Idiot. You just don't want to sit out there by yourself all night."

"Nope," Luffy says, grinning and fidgeting, "I sure don't!"

He's standing impatiently between the bunks, glancing around every few seconds to see if he's woken anyone else. The other five are fast asleep; Luffy has obviously been on watch duty for a while, now. Most times, he's fine, but every now and then he just gets something in his head, and those nights he can't stand not having company, even if it's the quiet, unresponsive kind. So Zoro - despite the myriad of injuries, throbbing under the annoying bandages Chopper still won't let him take off - rolls out of his bed and gets to his feet, so he can sleep on the lawn while his captain watches the sea.

-x-

(A/n) Between ThrillerBark and Sabaody, is what I'm thinking for this. Aaaand, I have no clue _what _it is, really - I just wanted to write Zoro and Kuina, because the relationship they could have had is an interesting one. I wasn't going to throw it in the drabble set, I wanted it to be something that stood on it's own, but I couldn't make it long enough and I threw in some Luffy-and-Zoro at the end, anyway, so it fits here because I say it does!

And thank you guys for the wonderful reviews! I'm glad these are entertaining someone~ C:

-Motcn


	20. walked a little softer

-x-

No Parking on the Battleground  
_walked a little softer_

-x-

He kind of always thought of Merry the same way he thinks of Zoro:

_Sturdy, unsinkable, and always there to catch him._

No one he has loved has ever let him down before - he has never thought of one of his friends as weak and unreliable, because it just isn't true. His friends are all strong and smart in their own ways, in the places he is weak and stupid, and Merry is exactly the same. She fills an empty place in his life, in his heart; she does her best, and that is all Luffy needs from her. It's all he needs from any of them. But a ship... is not like a person. No matter how much it might want to, a ship can't grow just because he is growing; a ship can't get stronger because he is getting stronger; a ship can't get better without the right kind of care, even if it's the only kind of care they can give; a ship can't look after itself; a ship can't change to fit him.

Maybe he could have changed to fit the ship, if he had realized this sooner.

He could have walked a little softer.

He loves Merry - like he loves all his friends - and he has never changed to fit one of them, but he is what they need him to be.

That's the captain's job, isn't it? To be the thing that everyone else needs? Merry needed something different from him. He has one job, and somehow, this time, he didn't do it right. And it breaks Luffy's heart to know that he has let a friend down - he has hurt a friend so much - and Merry still has the heart to forgive him for it.

-x-

(A/n) Oh god damn this stupid ship and my stupid ship feelings.

-Motcn


	21. the cabin in the night

-x-

No Parking on the Battleground  
_the cabin in the night_

-x-

Chopper feels the familiar cooling in the air long before the rest of them, and it delights him.

He feels the shift deep in his bones, prickling across his skin underneath the heavy fur, and he wonders absently if Nami - who is so amazing and smart when it comes to the weather and everything about it - well, he wonders if Nami feels it, too. She doesn't say anything if she does. It isn't a big, threatening type of shift, so it isn't really worth mentioning. It's subtle, and more like the way the wind _smells_, and maybe the direction, but Chopper never really pays attention to that. Nami probably decides that it's just the capricious Grand Line weather doing what it does best; the weather is mild, after all, alternately warm and windy, gently-stormy and misleading like the final dregs of summer.

And then suddenly, a full six days later, the cold creeps into the cabin in the night. Chopper is lying in his bunk on top of the covers with his eyes closed, trying to absorb the crisp, clear air in through his skin so he can save it up for later. He takes a deep breath through his nose, relishing in the smell, and lets it out slowly.

"It's snowing," he says quietly, to no one.

The others are still asleep, all bundled up under heavy blankets - except for Franky, who is on watch and has probably already seen the snow fall first-hand. Usopp has abandoned his open bunk for the more solid warmth of the sofa, securing himself tightly in a blanket so none of the frigid air will get in, his nose pressed into the cushion. Brook doesn't seem to be bothered by the cold, and Chopper can hear him humming softly in his sleep from the end of the row. Sanji is sprawled out in his bunk, same as always except for the slightest, occasional shiver. And Luffy has rolled out of his own bunk and into Zoro's, and the swordsman has one arm and leg dangling out in the open air to accomodate his captain's gangly, intrusive limbs, the blanket clutched in his fist and caught between his toes to keep his digits from completely freezing. Luffy lies across his back, snoring soundly and obliviously.

Chopper eventually falls back to sleep listening to the noise, a broad smile on his face.

-x-

(A/n) I need to stop writing Chopper and cold things. It's starting to feel like a comfort zoan. CB

-Motcn


End file.
